What am I feeling? And what do I do with that?
Bullying can have a huge impact on our feelings. Take a moment to think about how you are feeling. Below are some examples that might give you words for how it’s affecting you. Alongside the feelings are some suggestions for things that might help:
Experiences of bullying can be confusing. It can be hard to work out how it’s affecting us or why it’s happening.
Writing your feelings down can help to make sense of the confusion. It can also help to write about what’s happening to you so that you have a record to show people if you feel they don’t understand or aren’t hearing how it’s affecting you.
Everything that’s happening can feel like too much and that it’s in your thoughts all the time.
Find the things that help – when things are tough distractions and taking time for yourself can help too. Examples of this could be spending time doing something you like, finding places where you can feel safe and supported or even making a self-soothe box. Here is information on what you could include in your Self soothe box from Young Minds: https://www.youngminds.org.uk/young-person/blog/how-to-make-a-self-soothe-box/
It’s normal to feel like nobody understands what you’re going through and that can make it hard to tell people as well. You might also be feeling like your experience is being dismissed.
What you are feeling is valid and it’s important that this is taken seriously. There are people who understand, and we are here to help. Sometimes finding ways to remind yourself you’re not alone can help. This could be by joining a group or talking to people.
Maybe you’re feeling like you don’t have anyone to turn to. If you’re not out yet it might feel hard to talk about the bullying with the people in your life.
Reach out. We are here and we care. It can be really hard to take that first step and talk about what you’re going through. It’s ok to take things at your own pace. Our Live Chat is anonymous, and text based to help you take that first step. Even if it doesn’t feel like it right now, there are people and places where you can be yourself and we’re here to help you find them.
You might be feeling isolated, or you find yourself withdrawing from the people in your life.
Sometimes sharing how you’re feeling with others can help you feel connected and supported. You could talk to a friend or a trusted adult. You can also talk to us. We’re here for you.
Maybe the bullying is causing shame about your gender identity or sexual orientation.
Find people and places that help you celebrate who you are. An example of this could be your school GSA (gender and sexual orientation alliance) or one of our Youth Groups. You could also explore content from other LGBTQ+ people that celebrates identity like books, Youtubers, TV shows or movies. Find things that validate who you are.
It could be that your being bullied to act a certain way or not be yourself.
It’s never ok for people to pressure you into doing things you don’t want to do. Sometimes identifying what you want to do can help. Write down the hopes you have for your life. You can also talk these through with a Youth Worker.
When we’re being bullied it can create a lot of anger. It’s not ok for people to be treating you badly and it’s ok to feel that it’s unfair.
Take action. This looks different for everyone. In the What can I do section of this resource there are examples of things you can do to stop the bullying. We are also here to talk to you and help you identify the steps that feel right for you.
However you are feeling, remember your feelings are valid. At LGBT Youth Scotland we are here to help. If talking things through would help then we are here.
